Missing My Max

You did not call
You did not bother
Did you think
I was busy with Father

Your furry face
I see each day
Passing by
Along the electronic highway

I reach out to touch
Your sweet paw
I long to feel
Your gentle maw

But you're far away
Across the wide sea
And I'm here alone
With nobody

I miss you, Love
I miss your sweet paws
I miss your lashing tail
And your imperious laws
(though not so much
your always sharp claws)

You do not call
You do not write
It's almost as though
We've had a fight
(did i miss the memo
while watching some dumb demo?)

You have to know
I wouldn't have left
But for the fear
Of being bereft
(Of my last standing parent, so to speak;
he doesn't stand much because he's so weak)

I miss you, Max
My lovely Boy
I wish I were still
Your favorite neko toy

Saw a Car

Saw a car
Didn't drive it too far
Felt real fine
Wished it were mine
When such a feeling comes over me
There's an overwhelming need for money
But times change
Feels strange
Car stayed put
I left

Where?

It's been over a month since you went away
Long ago you promised to stay
You said you were mine and that we'd always be together
Sweet enough words in fair, balmy weather
But now every night when I look for you
You're nowhere to be found; I'm so blue
Where are you when I need your warm embrace,
When Nouna and her Gurlz are all up in my face?
JJ's all right, but he's still such a kid
He's rarely willing to do as he's bid
Sure you call and murmur sweet nothings
But that's cold comfort, like your leftover clothings
Did I say something wrong? Didn't I do everything right?
Did I miss the moment when we had some ultimate fight?
Why have you gone so very far away?
Promise you'll come back to me some day

Rambling

Pudee's back from being away
Though rumor has it she's not here to stay
But I have friends with whom to spend my days
Three who sleep, one who continually plays

JJ keeps an open eye and ear
For when the garage lights appear
He always sounds the alert loud and clear
To let us know when a human is near

We quickly rise to sit and wait
At the courtyard screen gate
Whether early or very late
Our greetings always do elate

I only wish Pudee
Would stay longer with me

How Can It Be Pouring

How can it be pouring cats and dogs
Somewhere called the Midwest
When all I see are melting clogs
Beside my bone dry chest

The temperature has dropped a bit
Or so I have been told
The fog's returned on the Bay to sit
But I feel no hint of cold

The fussing continues to disturb my peace
As books go into boxes
I'll be glad enough when this ado can cease
And we eat some loxes

Someone has suggested
That rhyming is very high schoolish
But since I've never gone to school
I'll ignore such criticism as just plain foolish

Something's Up - Besides the Heat

Something's stirring, I can tell
Though I cannot understand very well
Pudee's leaving again, I think
The thought makes my heart sink
Every day every way
I try to tell her I want her to stay
When will she leave? I don't know
But I don't want her to go
Maybe if I love her enough
She'll stop packing all her stuff
And stay here contentedly
With me and the rest of the family

Energy Shortage

The wind picked up
My breath blew away
Pudee left
Though I begged her to stay

Now I lie here
Struggling to breathe
I may look calm
But inwardly I seethe

Pollen puts me in a pickle
Makes me limp and tired
I've licked my fur clean
Now I feel wired

But I don't feel strong
I don't feel frisky
I feel like moving
Is highly risky

No motion is best
Just let me rest

Hawks on High

The courtyard door is barred
While hawks swirl high overhead
Though Little Gurlz may whine and beg
They're better off live than dead

For everyone just wants fresh meat
And Little Gurlz are oh so sweet
Beneath their flashy fur so fine
Is tender meat on which to dine

So the courtyard door must remain unopen
No matter what is said
For 'tis better to live life in a gilded pen
Than to help young hawks be fed

Or is it?

D&D

Delta and Dawn are free at last
Leaving foolish humans in their past

They've finally made it
Down the river and out of the Bay
Past every idiot
Shouting and shooting every which way

Back to the peace and serenity
Of the deep blue ocean
The wide blue sea

Clearly Foggy

I'm in a clearly foggy state today
Wondering what I'm going to say
Ajax prowls, eager to play
JJ just wants the humans to stay

But for Ajax there can be no game
For JJ's wish just more of the same
The humans find home far too tame
So out they go and who's to blame?

This weekend
Is supposed to be
A time of remembrance,
That's the key
The living should pause
For those who died to be free

But all I hear
On the news right now
Is daily complaining
About gas prices and how
If only this or that or another
Then people would be nicer to each other

Too seldom these days do I hear a tale
Of someone's selfless deed helping others
Too rarely are the deaths reported on the air
About anyone laying down their life for their brothers
As though the heroes whose blood fed this land
Have all died out or worse
Been stifled or culled or even been banned
Leaving behind only a curse

I must be mistaken
Don't listen to me
My furry brain
Is all asea

Lost Field

There used to be a large wild field by the Bay
Filled with tangled grasses and weeds
Where feral rabbits and squirrels roamed free
And humans supplied their snacking needs

But like so many other long lost fields
Large smelly machines have overrun it
Now there's a long high chain-linked fence
Defining spaces where buildings might fit

The rabbits are gone, and the squirrels too
There's nothing left but flat rolled dirt
And evidence of roadkill in the street
Mute testament that some were worse than hurt

Buildings bring business and boost the economy
So it has been said
Money is good for the humans in the community
The old ways of life are dead

D & D

Delta and Dawn? Seriously? Pardon my prose, but -

Yep, that's what the mother and calf have been named, according to media reports. I am, of course, referring to the whales that are swimming in the Sacramento River, which has a lovely manmade levee. I guess the whales are fortunate neither picked up that name...

Does anyone besides me wonder why they linger near this particular bridge instead of moving on? Have I watched too much Star Trek? Can't help thinking they're trying to respond to a rendezvous all-call...

Okay, outta here and back to my own universe...

Weathering the Weather

Yesterday was very hot
Everyone just slept a lot

Just as well
Since the door was shut
Air was still
JJ had a tender gut

Smoke outside
Nearly gagged me too
PU was busy
Making such a hullabaloo
Cutting up herbs
And messing with the smoker flue


From sunup to sundown
Everything seemed way too bright
Cats aren't meant
To endure so much light
Neither are my ears
Made for such a loud din
Nearly brought me to tears
Listening to Sanjaya so thin

Finally the firelight
Ceased its oil-fueled flareups
Though the air remained smokey
Giving somebody serious hiccups
Odors of burnt flesh
Mixed scents of chicken and pork
Crisped veggies too
All ready for that poised fork
Closed out the day
At the start of the night
Ended activity
Restoring cool right

Summertime Tsunami Season

The moon is refilling
I saw its sliver tonight
The breeze is chilling
Despite today's sunshine delight
Eggs have hatched
Nests are emptied
The wasp hive is patched
Life is picking up speed
Kitty Eater was out again today
Chasing the Gurlz across the house
I just hung out in the wide clear bay
While JJ pretended to be chasing a mouse
But the wind's picking up
That's clear as can be
Tsunami season is upon us
Who live adjacent to the sea

A Different Kind of Whale Watching

Whale watching has taken on a decidedly different turn
As Bay Area residents tune in daily to learn
Whether or not a wayward whale and her young calf
Are still alive; yes, they've cut the distance by half
On their precarious return journey to the Pacific Ocean
From a trip up the Sacramento River that hasn't been fun
Yesterday they finally managed to do an about-face
Folks thought it had become a much simpler race
To return from so far inland back to the sea
Everyone watching keeps hoping that it's meant to be
Though today the whales turned back upstream again
As though they are determined to reach some distant inland fen
Perhaps these mammals have been contacted from outer space
And now seek to reach an unsuspected rendezvous place
But human scientists who think they know better than the whales
Insist on tagging and biopsying and badgering when all else fails
The din they've raised trying to herd this mother and child
Has to be distressing to all others trying to live in peace in the wild
Then again, perhaps the whales don't want to be left alone
Up the river without even a . . . cell phone . . .

Trash Talk

Found this tidbit floating around on a PETA-friendly website:

Some things dogs have eaten

In order to warn pet owners of the dangers lurking right under their noses in their house and yard an animal care facility in Raleigh, NC, put on display a “Museum of Foreign Body Ingestion.”

Here are some of the items on display there that dogs have eaten: laundry, cell phones, toys, many food related items such as wooden meat skewers and corn cobs, nails, coins, purses.

Most items had to be surgically removed by a veterinarian. Severe and continuous vomiting is the most common sign that something bad has been ingested. As always, prevention is the best cure.


Now, I've seen the Little Gurlz sampling odd things
Like shoes and towels and soda can rings

But they've never been foolish enough to swallow
Knowing instinctively what surely must follow

JJ, of course, is clearly part dog
When he was younger he was such a hog

But even he has never been so foolhardy
As to ingest a cell phone because he'd been tardy

To a popular meal that might have been gobbled up
Leaving him nothing but crunchies on which to sup


Face it: dogs are just poor overgrown creatures
With neither brains nor any attractive features

Sleep

Don't care what's happening in the world today
Just want to sleep my cares away

The morning was cold but now it's warm
Stay inside away from the insect swarm

Summer's coming and with it lots of smoke
Enough to make this feline choke

So keep those doors and windows closed
And when you're done, make sure the embers get hosed

The music's been way too loud all day
Please, please make it go away

Immigrants can come or go as they please
Just let me catch a few more zzzzz's

No one can possibly be pleased by any political resolution
Only the economy can provide a definitive solution

Quit the gouging and put more people to work
Don't let shirkers hang around and lurk

People want to be able to afford food and clothes
And shiny things they can hang on their appendages and nose

Whatever their neighbors have is fine
As long as it's not mine

Time for another nap now
So hush, and don't have a cow

A Louse in the House

While I wonder I wander
About my house
Seeking respite
From that confounded louse

I'm not naming names
Or making any accusations
But it's attitude that frames
Acts that yield sensations

Obscurity is only in the eye
Of the obtuse
Smokescreens cannot belie
Clear truths

If there are truly lice in this domain
From the outdoors one should refrain

Feline Doggerel

If only we'd stop trying to be happy we could have a pretty good time.
- Edith Wharton

Did I say it was hot?
The last two days have been so cold
My stomach's tied itself in a knot
Though bread is growing very green mold
A day of sleeping in
Was followed by a day locked inside
No new toys in the bin
The Little Gurlz nearly cried
When there was finally a chance to play
PU was nowhere to be found
Ajax nearly got carried away
I saw her paws dangling far from the ground
Smoke from the neighbor's yard
Proved to be barbecue
Though it made the Lady run so hard
I almost ran too
Finally the garage door
Opened invitingly
But cold was the floor
Frosting paws bitingly
So here I sit
Pondering verses
Can't have a fit
So I'll settle for curses

Clear Through the Fog

Grey skies
Foggy day
Cooling temps
Here by the Bay

Locked up
All day
Till garage door opened
Then time to play

Jerry Falwell
Fell asleep
Won't wake up
Don't weep

Plenty of others
Ready to preach
To rake in the dough
From all they can reach

Church and state
Should stay separate
Or mixed motives
Always lead to regret

I may dwell
In a clearly foggy place
But my thoughts remain clear
Of doubt there's no trace

Din in My Ears

Some call it music
I call it noise
People howling
Rattling my toys

Lyrics of longing
Lyrics of lust
If it doesn't stop
My eardrums are gonna bust

Whatever happened to making a difference
Catchy tunes all about change
Now all I hear when the music starts up again
Is tripe about feelings or people acting strange

American Idol panders to populist tastes
With songs and a band that totter down the middle of the road
The homogenization of the seventies is alive, if no better
Daunting and blunting any who would dare to be bold

Now for those who claim to want control of their music
Who invest the time to program an mp3 player
Shouldn't such pap be a thing of the past
Shouldn't the music I hear be stronger or gayer?

But no, I continue to be subjected
To strained tunes old and new
For my human's tastes (or selections)
Evidently are just too few

Sleeping In

Sleeping in is usually a solo activity
But today involved watching a loud tv
And sharing space and blankets too
And the occasional stroke or loving coo
Guess that makes the sharing worthwhile
Getting to sleep in fine feline style

Brain Befogged

So much negative news these days
Regarding contents of commercial pet food
Time to switch to homemade treats
Made with love and served with good attitude

The temperature has leveled off once again
I can hunker down comfortably in my den
There's time enough for a loving cuddle
Without encountering a sweaty muddle

Rhyming in sweltering heat
Is just too exhausting

Too Hot

I say it's too hot
JJ says it's not

I spend my days atop the tree
Where no one else can reach me

The Gurlz bound energetically across the grass
No thanks, say I, I think I'll pass

All that running and jumping is for the young
I'd rather not have to hang out my tongue

I'm not a dog or even a spry kitten
I'd rather spend my days sittin'

Nouna's a lady who understands
She's content to watch the lands

Lying cool and quiet within
Far from all that din

Quietly we sleep
Within the keep

Back at Last

My PU's back and I'm so happy
Time to blog something really really sappy
Hugs and kisses and rubbings abound
The One who was lost has now been found

My PU's back and I'm so excited
Heard the car before she was sighted
Packs and bags swinging so dangerously
I don't care; my PU's back and I'm filled with glee

My PU's back and I'm higher than a kite
Now she's back, everything's right
Today the sun is shining instead of that dismal rain
Even the Little Gurlz have stopped being a pain


JJ's bouncing and eating again
Nouna has stopped being a wet hen
Ajax has got her game once more
Comet is once again eager to explore

Now I can relax and let down my guard
Being the Big Boy has really been hard
But now PU's back and life is once again sweet
Amongst all our paws are two sturdy feet

Mini-Max

I saw a younger version of my son today
He sat in the bushes looking to play
I saw his footprints all over my car hood
Right before I saw his tail disappear under a pile of wood
He has that same soulful look as my Boy
A promise of being a most excellent toy
But there's really only one Max for me
That's the one I can't wait to see

Something's Up

Pudee's busy and that's not right
Nouna's been challenging JJ to a fight
Comet wants to join in but doesn't quite know how
Ajax just wants her daily game, and she wants it now

I'm a simple fellow with loving on my mind
All I want is everyone to be gentle and kind
The dryer just stopped so I have to go
I'll lose my seat if I'm too slow

I hear the East Coast is stormy and wet
I'm glad that kind of weather hasn't reached here yet
Tomorrow should be another sunny day
Too bad the weekend won't be staying that way

There's violence on the news today and it's very sad to hear
People go to college to learn, not to live in fear
When the shots rang out, there was little heard
Till two hours later when an email was read by a curious nerd

What kind of warning is only sent on the Net?
People haven't lost their hearing yet
Hindsight, however, is too easy a critique
What should have been is an argument too weak

People do what they do in times of stress
Trying to contain the spread of distress
If they guess right, they're heroes to the world
If they guess wrong, accusations are hurled

Now I'm guessing that Pudee's getting ready to take flight
If she does, I'll be lonely; I don't want to be right
I'd rather by far that she stay right here
I want my Pudee very near.

Tough Day

The sun is back
The wind is up
Nouna's on the prowl
JJ's woe is a full cup

The compost has manure
The Gurlz like it lots
They may be stinky
But JJ's got the hots

That doesn't matter
It's just been a tough day
The music is all madness
Karaoke still holds sway

Why doesn't someone
Make earplugs for cats
Pudee's still yowling
Less sharps, too many flats

Time to turn inward
Find some private place for peace
Hunker down and flatten my ears
Till that pathetic noise does cease

On-Demand Selection

My human found the
Karaoke button this
Weak end - Woe is AI

Note: Max disavows all connection with this entry.

Sunny Friday

Shannon has snow on the ground and sleet all around
But I've spent today lying out in the sun
Melissa writes of spring in the air and music in her ears
But these warmer temps mean I'm getting nothing done

There are plenty of tasks awaiting my attention:
There's soil to mound and sushi to roll
There's an oven to clean and chicken impatiently waiting,
But I'd rather find air-conditioning and bowl

No, that's not true either, if the truth be told
I'd rather bug PU and practice my firm hold

Someone has accused me of lacking rhythm and tune
A complaint lodged when I last serenaded the moon
But if you could have heard the base caterwauling last night
You, too, would have hidden in awe-inspired fright
As the newly discovered Comcast karaoke "singing" began
And frightened us all: wild beasts, homebound cats, and the neighbor's whole clan
It's okay, Little Darlings, everything is all right
PU will get over it; just sit tight

Morning Observations

Morning Observations

It’s always fun
When other chores are done
To return to a blank screen
And try to say what one might really mean

Let’s see –

This morning this Furry Son sat enjoying the Spring sun
As a sprightly young lass bounded joyfully about the grass
There was nothing she couldn’t vault because this morning’s dustup wasn’t her fault
She stretched out her little toe and began to hoe
In the now bereft former turnip patch
Where’d she’d been waiting to watch a wasp hatch
Or perhaps there had been a spider’s eggs
Waiting to burst open between her legs
In any event she was filled with the glee that comes only with release
When one has survived an encounter with a parent and fled in one piece
Now she lies resting from her morning’s exertions
While her sister prowls about looking for her own special excursions
And through it all JJ sits, a silent sentinel
Waiting for his turn to go where he will

Warming's Biggest Wallop

Warming's biggest wallop aimed at wildlife, not people | csmonitor.com

Global warming continues to be in the news today
Scientists from around the world have much to say
Some of it's good, some of it's sad
CO2 emissions evidently aren't all bad
Plants are growing bigger and stronger
As warm seasons are lasting longer
But ecosystems can't help but be affected
As species after species can no longer be detected
The coldest climes are hurting the most
As life used to the cold is becoming toast
Everything that wants to survive
Has to shift over or take a dive
Meat and vegetables, whatever they used to eat
Now they must forage for some other treat
I guess I'm lucky my family has become domesticated
Or my littermates and I might also have been ill-fated

Big Bro Tracks Well

It's not enough that GPS now comes standard in every new car
Now they're tracking walruses on their journeys near and far
Truth to tell humans have been tagging animals in the wild
From wintry wastelands to waters where the weather is mild
For more decades than I've been alive
Yet wild creatures still manage to survive
Though their numbers are dwindling, it's true
As constructions buries more and more morning dew
Land, sea, air
All venues once so fair
Are now under continual assault
By humans who deny any fault
Everyone needs nesting spaces for their young and old
Shelters and hideaways from enemies, work, and cold
Harmony is for paintings in drafty halls
Not for wild things trying to avoid abrupt falls

Perils of Penguins and Other Sad Stories

Winter has broken and Spring is upon us
Flowers are blooming with all sorts of fuss
But as we rejoice in the return of warmer days
Politicians debate the ever more bewildering maze
Of climactic changes attributed to global warming
Resulting in melting ice caps and severe storming
An earthquake induced tsunami has ravaged the Solomon Islands
While penguins are disappearing individually and by bands
It's hard to know right from wrong
So much simpler to simply go along
Let "wiser" heads decide what should be done
Then wonder what happened when there's too much sun
Or not enough air - just blame it on the pollen
And try to ignore how many innocents have fallen

Recalled Pet Food Revisited

The list has grown to hundreds of labels
The death toll is rising too
People should cook for their pets
Mine does; don't you?

Of course, my human shops in Chinatown
But I don't often get gravy
It's just boiled or grilled or baked for us
Nothing havey-cavey

This growing global economy
Has allowed more fingers to point
Companies, like people, need to step up
And admit when they've rolled a joint

Your furry friends have entrusted themselves to you
Believing you know what you're doing
You need to take a firmer stand
And do more than just your usual cooing

Just because you call us pets
Doesn't mean you can neglect our care
Watching out for us
Means more than the occasional bath and trimming of hair

Foie Gras-Laced Hot Dogs

Chicago has banned foie gras-laced hot dogs
That's fine; they're just lumps on logs
Those pups think that they're so fine
You'd never catch me claiming one of them as mine
Their meat is mixed with duck liver paste
Harvested from birds that have been bred in haste
I like my fowl free from contamination
In fact, all my food without need of explanation
But I also believe in free feeding for all
So I'm against banning duck livers from the mall
I'm glad I'm not slated to be made into someone's meal
But seriously, folks, let's get real
This nation runs on speed and commerce
And that, folks, is the end of today's verse.

I'se Closed

You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.
- Jack London

The sun is shining but my eyes are closed
There's nothing left through which I haven't nosed
The Little Ones may gambol as they please
JJ is still susceptible to a friendly tease
But all I need on such a day as this
Is some timely sweet loving and a gentle kiss
Food there is aplenty, of that I can be sure
Water is where I want it without an estate tour
The roaring of planes overhead are easy to ignore
Only the dreaded kitty eater is still not a bore
I don't have to file taxes because I have four paws
No IRS agent can get me with his legal claws
Looming tax deadlines don't worry me
Because as a cat, I'm financially free

Woolly Organ Donors

This article was billed as a discussion of furry organ donors, but evidently it refers to a slightly different direction. Remember Dolly, the first cloned sheep? Well, evidently her species has been providing researchers with opportunities for more genetic experiments. While this may all bode well and good for the future of medicine, I am personally concerned with potential conflicts over the future of my lamb and mutton consumption... Very disturbing... very disturbing...

Good thing the humans have stopped feeding us Iams Lamb mix...

clipped from www.dailymail.co.uk Chimera: sheep have 15 per cent human cells and 85 per cent animal cells The sheep have 15 per cent human cells and 85 per cent animal cells - and their evolution brings the prospect of animal organs being transplanted into humans one step closer. Professor Esmail Zanjani, of the University of Nevada, has spent seven years and £5million perfecting the technique, which involves injecting adult human cells into a sheep's foetus. He has already created a sheep liver which has a large proportion of human cells and eventually hopes to precisely match a sheep to a transplant patient, using their own stem cells to create their own flock of sheep. The process would involve extracting stem cells from the donor's bone marrow and injecting them into the peritoneum of a sheep's foetus. When the lamb is born, two months later, it would have a liver, heart, lungs and brain that are partly human and available for transplant.

Rainy Daze Amaze

Been awhile since we've had a proper rain
With water visibly running across each pane
The kind of day that makes you just want to huddle
Deep in the blankets with your favorite cuddle
No sense sitting out in the kitchen cold
Just to prove that your heart is bold
Better to find your favorite warm place
And claim it before someone tries to steal your space
The Little Gurlz have been restless all morning
Well aware of the overnight meteorological warning
That there's a storm coming, as all the SF movies claim
Right before everyone in sight gets maimed
But that's a different subject than this
As I sit here making a wish
For sunny skies or warm bodies or both
That stimulate positive feelings and healthy growth
It's a good day to ignore what passes these days for news
Items that remind me more of little kittens' mews
With all those reports of the piteous states
Of people and places and nonexistent rebates
Today is better by far I think
For rambling and stopping to sip a refreshing drink

Return of the Kitty Eater

Max was very brave today
Held his ground and did not sway

Nouna held her place as well
Until the monstrous sound did swell

JJ wisely sat outside
A little unnerved but too proud to hide

The Gurlz were flashes of tail in flight
Better today to run than fight

Perhaps that's why later in the day
Each tried to swing at poor JJ

The simple truth is that everyone turns tail
When the vacuum comes, it's time to bail

This and That

Pudee's unhappy
So it's up to me
To make her feel better,
Her worries unfetter

Her arm is sore
Perhaps a muscle she tore
Or maybe there's a pinched nerve
That she doesn't deserve

The doctor sounds nice,
Gave her pharmaceutical advice
A pill for the arm, a wash for the ear,
Come back in a week when everything's clear

Pudee came home through the rain and brought back the sun
Listened to the doctor and promised to run
But Pudee likes to eat
Before stroking my feet

So here we sit, Pudee and I,
Cuddling before the keyboard
All warm and dry.

Tomorrow the sun will shine again
The kitty eater will be out
To vacuum up my den

Tomorrow is soon enough to worry
About life's ongoing strains
Today it's great to be loved and furry.

Pet food maker announces major recall - Yahoo! News

Pet food maker announces major recall - Yahoo! News

Now, this is an article that disturbs me as much as other articles might disturb my human. I'll be the first to admit that I like chunks of meat slathered in gravy, and my human knows that. I guess I should be grateful that JJ's delicate gastronomic difficulties have pretty much put such delicacies out of the majority of cans in our cupboard of late. We've been getting a pretty exclusive diet of canned tuna combinations, the taurine-laced chicken coming primarily in the form of admittedly tasty crunchies (dry food). On rare occasions, (such as my birthday), we get fresh shrimp - yum!

Now I ask you, what's one company doing distributing canned goods under 17, count 'em: seventeen different labels? How's a fella to know whether or not he's being fed safe food? If I wanted to take my chances with my diet, I'd follow my mother back to the feral world...

Ah well...

Smoked Out

Smoke smoke everywhere
How's a cat to breathe?
It smells like fire and danger here
How could danger be so near?

What is Pudee thinking of doing
With all that smoky burning
There's good meat, too, going to waste
Steaming and melting and turning to paste

The day is long and, oh, so hot
Wouldn't it be easier to use a pot?
Why must there be all this smoke
That makes a fella want to choke?

We're all locked in
The Gurlz are driving me crazy
With their dashing about
And their whoopsa daisy

The sun has set
The fire's died down
The meat is in
It's quiet all around

That's pork.
It smells so good
Is that for humans
Or is it nekko food?

You stink,
I think
But that's okay
I love you anyway

Achoooooo!

Gender Voting?

Rumor has it there's a woman running for the presidency
Which is fine, since she's already had experience in residency
But some media midget notes that not all women might vote for her
As though any other choice suggests the opposite of a cur
After all, men have historically voted for men
(Not as though there'd been any other kinds of candidates then)
Of course, they thought all Roman Catholics would vote for Kennedy
And feared some sort of religious remedy
For whatever it was that ailed this country then
Something about an oversized police action in some tropical fen
Now, of course, we're wrestling with a post-war stabilizing action
That has outraged yet another nationwide anti-war faction
But it's good to see that life progresses
And all the ills our military redresses
So that the American Way is preserved
And contestants can be mocked as they deserved
On televised game shows and talent hunts
And annual athletic tournament runts
Can strut their stuff with pride and glee
To the everlasting amusement of viewers like me

In Need of Kneading

Pudee's clearly in need of kneading
And I do the best that I can
But it's hard to do a proper job
When nasty chemicals create a ban
Then there's the bit about never being home
That just adds to the daunting challenge
Of doing the job though banished to the fringe
Those muscles are so tight, you see
And the pressure is clearly mounting
All I can do is keep up the lovings
And let my paws do the counting

Eventful Day

The house phone rang
There was some talk
I heard a bang
And found myself being carted down the walk

The engine was warm
The road was short
Banfield smells
And the people ran true to form

I was hauled out of hiding
And into the light
Though I complained
There was no chance for a fair fight

I didn't ask for the anal probe
Nor the bloodletting needle
Whipped out of that robe

Who needs antibiotics
Or vaccine serums
That are administered by/with such painful pricks?

At least the visit was short and quick
And no one tried to measure my - - - -
The car ride back was leisurely and long
But I didn't have to listen to that stupid song

By the time we got back
I was almost okay
Didn't need to hit the sack
Or climb into any hay

The sun was shining
The garage was cool
I got to prowl
And be my own proud fool

There was still time for lovings aplenty you see
Back at the house with my Pudee

Oh, the Noise

Pudee's back and boy, is it noisy!
Whatever happened to quiet, sunny days?
There's banging and hammering that's driving me crazy
And lumber in the courtyard making a dangerous maze
The Gurlz are so restless as they prowl about the garage
Only JJ is sensibly sleeping in the sun.
Though it's not hot enough to form a mirage,
Things are still too upsetting for any real fun.
I can't get a handle on the changes that have been going on
Like Pudee actually getting up at the crack of dawn.
What's up with that, I'd like to know
Tell me please, so I don't stub my toe.

Doggerel's unseemly for a cool cat like me
So I'm just gonna let this sad blog be...

Pudee's Back

Pudee's back is broad and strong
I can hang there all night long

Pudee's back and I'm a purr box again
The house is noisier than I don't know when

Pudee's back is covered with bites
As though there've been some ugly fights

But Pudee's back so nothing can be wrong
I'm glad, because it's been far too long

Chaos in the House

One's back, one's going
How's a fellow to be knowing
Whether up is down or what
I can handle anything but
Losing my Pudee again
Not getting daily lovings now and then
One suitcase up, one suitcase down
And talk of someone going to town
Stay here and be with me
Stay and keep me company
Don't go off into the big grey sky
Telling me you'll see me by and by
What good is that to this lonely cat
If you go and I'm left flat
With only these pesky females and JJ
Who just want to play all day
I tell you now and I tell you true
Till you come home again I'll be blue

Long Lonely Days

The days and nights blend together as we huddle together for warmth. The Little Ones are quite grown now, and tempting to a fellow who once was frisky. I tried mounting one recently, but only to school her about taking my "Passport" outside. Pudee gave me a bit of a cold shoulder until things were satisfactorily explained.

JJ has been both frisky and queasy, missing his human more than all the rest of us put together, I think. I can understand that, as I have had to go through the same thing myself. Still, Pudee has been giving him lots of lovings, if not a lot of savory table scraps. I must say the quality of food has dropped off of late, though I know not why. We all hope things will turn around soon.

Nouna had been behaving so beautifully that Pudee got overly trusting. We had in-and-out privileges for several wonderfully sunny days after the long, cold winter grey. Then, about two days ago, Nouna made a break for it again. As soon as the courtyard door opened, she was out the door, up the trellis, and across the roof. Pudee hadn't even had time to walk away, so of course there was great consternation and a hue and cry went up. The upside of this is that a fresh can of wet food was used in an attempt to lure Nouna back down. Better yet, she declined the food and we got to eat it. The downside is that since she's returned, the skies have turned chilly and grey again, and the door has remained steadfastly shut against any further courtyard visits - for anyone. Now how is that fair?

Still, today is peaceful and quiet for the first time since that wretched Jim Dale started droning on and on nearly a month ago. I am so glad that's over... for now.

Must get back to sleeping - busy busy busy

Not So Hot

I'm not feeling so hot today
Spent most of it in bed
My nose continues to run, you see
And I have a stuffed up head

JJ's under the blanket
With his back cuddled up against mine
I've tried cuddling pudee
But that one's too busy online

What's a fellow to do
When his nose just won't stop running
And his head is pounding so hard
It sounds like somebody gunning?

Guess I'll just have to go back to bed
And hope for a better tomorrow
For today is just too cold
And clearly ripe for sorrow

nee Freedom

What's the point in having humans home
If we're still constrained as to where we can roam?
The bedrooms and hallways are all well enough
But I'm more than ready for some other stuff
Like blue skies and green grass and birds in the air
That mock from high up without a care
This is supposed to be the land of the free
But rules that bind are all I can see
Since when is surveillance the rule of the land,
Restraining wills with an invisible yet iron hand?
I thought McCarthy had long since retired
But now it seems there's an heir that he's sired
Techno lust for cool toys have brought blissless chains
Binding so many with endless refrains

A Day in Nouna's Life

I've been tracking Pudee again today,
From room to room and stove to bay.
We've had a brisk game
And time in the courtyard.
I've finally regained trust,
Though the road has been long and hard.
The sun has been shy
These past couple of weeks;
We've been trapped in this house
With only a few outside peeks.
Now it's almost time for dinner
And the feeder's nowhere in site.
Pudee had better get going
And make things right.

Inside Outside

The sun shone bright
The house was warm
How could I know
Of the coming storm?

The light gleamed bright
On my sun-warmed hide
Clearly it was a perfect day
To spend outside.

When the door opened
I scampered right out
The Gurlz were there too
Charging all about.

It took several moments
Till we noticed the cold
The concrete was freezing
For this I'm too old.

I turned right about
And returned to the house
Where the heater is warm
And I can find my toy mouse.

Jumpin' JJ

Today's the day for jumpin' JJ
Everybody join in the game and play
The Boy's just too easy skittering about
We Gurlz can corner him or shut him out
Mom leads the way with a growl and a swat
Whee! We're having fun, even if JJ's not
Oops! I think we're busted, here comes Pudee
Out of my way, better lickings for you than for me

Not on Fridays

P.U. doesn't usually blog on Fridays, I've noticed, perhaps because lucidity is not a high priority on this particular day of the week. Tonight, however, I'm determined to report that clear skies have not prevented this report from a clearly foggy place.

Dreamgirls is advertising the character of Dena, even though the storyline clearly belongs to Jennifer Hudson's Effie character.

A democratic senator from back home is purported to be advocating the institution of a mandatory draft for men and women, ages 18-26, even though his lifelong political position has been anti-war since the days of Vietnam.

President Bush seeks an extension of the clearly ineffective "No Child Left Behind" program.

Do I have my priorities confused? All I really want is a warm place in which to sleep and tasty wet food twice daily, assuming a steady supply of tasty dry food, of course. Is that so much to ask of life?

Just how befogged am I, really?

Quote of the Day

"We've heard that a million monkeys at a million keyboards could produce the complete works of Shakespeare; now, thanks to the Internet, we know that is not true."
- Robert Wilensky

And yet we keep trying... or perhaps it's just that the above quoted wit has yet to reassemble all those random words in the correct order...

Just got done with a jigsaw puzzle, and boy, do my paws twinge. The Zillas kept trying to sample the pieces, as though they were sound bites or kibbles.

Popped up on my P.U. as usual, only to find a Zilla down below. I went catfishing with my tail, but this one's not yet claw-trained, so I abandoned P.U. to those pesky paws.

Trying to be appreciative of not living in snow country - but I do love the fog - if only it were here! Instead, the sky is deceptively brillig as the temperature drops and the forecast promises the winds will be picking up momentarily. Oh joy . . .

There are two newly dubbed computer cats stealing my thunder around here these days. They bring rain, too, every time they sneeze. Sure hope they prove to be as bad at sharing their colds as they have been at sharing everything else.

Sour grapes? I don't eat fruit; I'm strictly a carnivore, despite the rice fillers those nasty human cat can producers try to make you think. Oh, my delicate stomach...

Well, enough of this - I still don't see any great works of Shakespeare emerging from my meanderings about this keyboard. Perhaps another time...

Remember: Pause for Paws.
Meow

Full Moon

I'm a fool for a full moon
Of that I'm quite aware
That bright glowing orb in the sky
Washes away my every care
The year is young and so am I
Though the Zillas are younger still
They're not the ones who've leapt over walls
And tasted a fresh rat kill
The Boyz think they are so all that
But face it fellas: I'm the Top Cat.

Nouna