As the moon refills and the year turns end over end, my feline family and I wish to those of you who occasionally visit our page a new year filled with peace, contentment, satisfaction, fulfillment, and lots and lots of fish.
Max, JJ, Nouna, Comet, and Ajax
Hyber Nation
3 December 2006
The weather’s too cold for my paws to tap on these keys
There are too many felines here for my human to please
There’s never enough wet food set out in the plates
To prevent increasingly daily spates
JJ’s been ostracized by the Gurlz or on his own
Whatever the case, now he’s often alone
So how does a fellow who’s becoming skin and bones
Stay warm at night so far from the charging cell phones
The last time I saw him he’d hidden in plain sight
On top of the dryer still quaking with fright
He’s been slapped at and clawed, mounted too
He’s one Abyssinian who’s seriously blue
It’s time for us all to settle down for some deep sleep
While we wait for warmer weather, surely these arguments will keep
Two buildings over and down the street
I can hear the sound of swift-running feet
Across the quad there's a light in the dome
But over here all's cold and dark - no one's home
The sound of music throbs through the wall
But of humans there's no sign at all
The food dishes are empty, the water's almost all gone
Will this be another long night without dawn?
Promises were made and kisses given out
Assurances there'd be dinner, without a doubt
But the kitchen is dark and the house feels empty
How I miss the days of plenty
I'll vote for anyone promising change
Then pray I don't end up with mange
JJ’s Visit
15 November 2006
JJ went to a new vet today
Mom’s trying to chase his blues away
She thinks he’s losing too much weight
He’s just not eating as much as he once ate
The Gurlz gang up and fence him in
Blocking him off when it’s time for din-din
They think they’re playing and love to tease
Buzzing around him like so many bees
But he’s not used to not having first plate
So he’s having trouble adjusting to his new fate
I must admit I’m not too keen either
On having to deal with every eager beaver
That wants my time and attention and space
Every little chica who doesn’t know her place
No, I’m not
A snot.
Those squirts have both had growth spurts
Oh my poor head
I'm constantly nudged and bumped and budged
JJ's corraled every day
All because
Those squirts have both had growth spurts
Female upstarts everywhere
In politics and at home
They're really getting under my hair
I wish I had a comb
They challenge everything with a dare
I wish I could get out and roam
Then I could evade each and every stare
And not have to write this poem
The holiday season is upon us once again, and thoughts turn naturally to decorations, mostly because neighbors and store windows don't let us keep such thoughts from our otherwise engaged minds. Still...
There's a lovely collection of victorian model houses that had been growing prior to the advent of Cats-R-Us here, and now that JJ and I are mature, sedate Big Boyz, there was talk of reviving the tradition. There is, however, obviously a new threat(s) in town: Ajaxzilla and Commazilla. These clearly radiated kitties have been growing at astronomical rates and are now monstrous creatures who have outgrown JJ, though they don't seem to have adjusted to their exponentially increasing sizes yet. They are now tall enough to leap up onto the lower bookcases, but they lack the agility or grace to tippaw through the paraphernalia there; consequently, the i-pod speakers are fallen soldiers even as these fingers tap. What will happen if a miniature town is erected? Will it even get that far?
On a side note, Ajax's tail has achieved a decidedly phallic appearance, if anyone's looking. This is in marked contrast to her otherwise gracefully feminine feline nack. Comet, on the other hand, has a more blockish upper torso but slimmer hips and an unremarkable tail. Naturally, she is the more girly of the two. Funny how such things play out...
Play on!
Oh bliss! The fog blanket is back
Encouraging all to spend the morning in the sack
There's an aura of mystic fantasy just across the Bay
Where happy memories of my kittenhood still hold sway
Today's an appropriate day for the fog, too
As politics erupt across this state zoo
Television ads blare and the phone keeps on ringing
Bombarding the innocent and the unsuspecting
PU has spent the morning poring over mail old and new
Trying to get a clearer view
Of issues and facts amongst the plethora of words
Finally concluding that the whole mess is for the birds
Voting's a privilege and a responsibility
Though sometimes the reason's hard to see
People play all sorts of curious games
To solicit advantage behind famous names
When all has been said and done at the end of the day
It's still the next generations that will have to pay
We live in a fog, that's clear to see
Letting things go on as though they were meant to be
Stability
5 November 2006
P.U.’s home, this time to stay
The Gurlz have grown so
But still like to play
JJ is shrinking, just wasting away
He’s lost his youngest status
And with it his final say
Ajax thinks AJ = JJ, you see
So she bounds in and takes
Whatever offerings there be
Together Ajax and Comet
Have taken over the house
There’s precious little yet
That they don’t successfully pounce
Political solicitations that arrive in the mail
Are fair game; each piece they equally assail
Though they’re past teething, their claws are still sharp
Even though each week to trim them I carp
Still, the treetop is mine by right and possession
And all little kitties come to me for confession ;->
My human is gone again, where I'm not sure. I keep getting these random nuzzling thoughts in the wee hours of the night. They wake me for my evening prowls, leaving me restless... and so lonely. Besides, the bed is too crowded with all the new kids.
What the . . . ?
25 August 2006
So I was hanging out in the laundry room, minding my own business, when suddenly my olfactory system was brutally assaulted. I looked around, but there was no one in the nearby litter box, nor evidently had been recently. JJ, who’d been hanging out nearby in the hall, also looked startled. We looked at each other questioningly, then over to the New Kid, that seemingly innocent little mischief maker calmly sitting in the middle of the hallway with her legs widespread, licking away what was left of what had to have been the most amazing fut, especially for such a little girl. No fem, that one, that’s for sure!
Phew!
It’s Raining Cats
24 August 2006
My apologies to those of you who have faithfully popped in of occasion, only to find me absent. My only explanation, and it’s not intended as an excuse by any means, is that it’s raining cats here, one of whom is convinced she’s a he, and a dog to boot. ‘S wonderful!
After some initial hissing and growling that really scared oh, Everyone, things have settled down to the occasional territorial nose swipe. The daily wrestling matches obviate the need for television, as do the daily feather and ribbon games. There’s a whole lot of mousing around going on, thankfully all imitation.
Unfortunately, the fecal count is quite authentic, as is someone’s bad aim. Now, that last, I really don’t understand, P.U. having made sure to purchase the jumbo size litter trays. Ah well… Personally, whenever I find what looks like a soggy “roach”, sans clip, I take it as a very pointed statement. All I have to do is figure out what the protest is, then deal with it. Again unfortunately, I think there may be some definitively stances being taken about courtyard privileges. Clearly, it’s too soon for the Gurlz, who are still subliminally recalibrating their internal compasses. So I guess I’ll just keep sidestepping those little treasures and cherishing the memories…
At least my muscle tone seems to be returning. I’m certainly getting a whole lot less sleep than of yore.
Cat Fishing
11 August 2006
I love fish. I love fishing. Lately P.U. has taken to cat fishing again. Two Gurlz and a Boy, to be exact. Oh how the feather does fly, though fortunately not the fur, hissing and staring notwithstanding. Was I ever that energetic? I think so, before JJ came, though that was so long ago now, I have only my memory for proof, and I, of course, am in a clearly foggy place.
Fur like an angel, face like a demon, sweet little lady with a growl like a tita, she sleeps beneath my bed and shares my window view. Her offspring infuriate her, unwilling as they are to leave her weary teats, yet she never lets go of her dignity, spitfire though she be.
Her children irritate and entertain me by turns, taking after their father, I presume. I must get to know her better: Nouna - person, place, thing of all things.
How time flies! I could have sworn I'd only missed one day of blogging, but then again, there was the whole disconnected mess yesterday. P.U. spent most of the day trying to reestablish Internet connection after discovering that someone, naming no names, had unplugged a couple of things, besides shutting down a few others. But I tell no tales...
I think I'm starting to get used to the new kids, hyperactive though they can sometimes be. More important, they have a very lovely mother . . . But really, it's too soon to speak of such things.
JJ still hisses when the girls enter his space, but I've been doing a little investigating, and they seem to be all right. In fact, that Ajax reminds me a lot of JJ when he first came. She never seems to tire, is always ready for a game, and has to sample everything, from water dishes and food to litter boxes. That child knows no boundaries. It'll be interesting to see how she progresses in the family, especially after last night.
Last night - Last night Nouna, the Lovely Lady, finally deigned to emerge from hiding. She even actually joined us for a time on the bed. What I particularly appreciated, however, was her hissing Ajax away when she tried to join us. That child never seems to want to let anyone ... simply be. We'll see...
The other youngster, Comet, is a leaper. Yesterday she challenged me by repeatedly climbing to the top of the new cat tree. This morning I showed her real climbing: I mounted the bedroom wardrobe. Of course, I had to call P.U. twice to help me down, but still... we left Comet puzzling over how she could get up there. She can't, of course; at least, not until she gets a bit older and longer. By then it won't matter.
Still, we've progressed to touching noses, the kittens and I. Soon, soon, I hope to share sniffs with Nouna. What a Lady!
They're still in there. Last night they started playing around 2 a.m. For that they got an early feeding. It doesn't matter that we did, too; it's not right, messing with the daily schedule that way.
P.U. was out all morning, as often happens. You'd think those Gurlz would take the opportunity to catch up on some sleep, but not those hyperactive gits! By the time P.U. returned, there'd been plenty of banging on both sides of that door.
Fortunately, they have to stay inside when P.U. comes home, while we get to meet and greet our human. Today a five-tiered skyscraper was wrestled into the living room. Naturally I exerted all caution, carefully sniffing it from every angle before proceeding. Then I scratched it; JJ helped. Soon, however, we realized that scratching would not suffice, so up we went. I made it to the second tier from the top, a tubular setup. P.U. put JJ on the top tier, but at least I got up on my own merits. (Much to my chagrin, Comet later scampered right up the tree to that top tier all by herself.)
P.U. finally opened the door, and I was immediately assailed by the odors. Naturally I took my time examining them. I do watch CSI, after all.
There have been three door openings today, each involving lengthier and lengthier explorations by the Gurlz. Only I have reciprocated thus far, but JJ is giving it some thought...
Once, the most recent time, Ajax made a successful break for the door as Nouna, that strikingly beautiful grey, was being taken back in. Unfortunately, Comet didn't quite make it; her paw must have gotten caught in the hinge area. You could hear her all over the neighborhood. She seems to be okay now, but her yowling has had a startling effect on me. It has served as a wakeup call to me that these are really children. Since then I've been keeping an eye on that Ajax. What an idiotic rascal she is! What a shame my human thinks she's so cute.
To be continued...
Where did it all begin? P.U. had finally returned from an extended stay and life was settling back to normal when the dreaded black suitcase descended from the closet shelf again. In vain I tried to stop the packing, only to find myself stymied at every turn. Sure enough, on Wednesday afternoon, the house emptied out and stayed that way. JJ and I waited all that night and the next day, but no one came through any doors.
Then Thursday evening Aunty L came and stayed for awhile. She always tries to pet me, but I'm too fast for her. JJ's a better host than I am; he just sits out there in the living room, politely chasing whatever toy she deigns to offer him. It's nice of him to give her something for her time and effort in keeping us company and feeding us.
Friday was more of the same. Fortunately, the weather finally started to cool off, so the house wasn't such a sweat box. Ever seen those WWII movies? I haven't...
By Saturday JJ and I were both feeling pretty lethargic when suddenly we heard a familiar sound: the car! Sure enough, we soon heard the outer garage door opening. Like a flash we charged the courtyard, arriving simultaneously outside the courtyard door. Oh, the joy! P.U. had returned.
I couldn't believe it when P.U. headed out again Sunday afternoon. Usually, there's at least a 48-hour stay before any motion is made to head back out. I admit I was worried, but I had no idea how worried I should have been.
Several hours later P.U. arrived bearing two carriers. Inside the carriers I smelled - something strange - females! I'd almost forgotten the smell. Sometimes I can almost remember my mother and my litter mates. I had five sisters and two brothers, I think. This, however, was different. I hissed, just to let the strangers know whose house they were entering.
Today has been more of the same. P.U. opened the closed door for awhile this morning, and I put in an obligatory appearance to hiss, just to let the newcomers know that this is my house. I think they got the message. Time will tell.
I had to hiss JJ, too, so that he would know where he stands in all this. Since then, however, I've also let him know he's still #2, well ahead of the strangers.
Two of the strangers are very little. I'll have to think about that. There's a female, though. I can sense her, and I've got her scent. I know she senses me, too. We'll see about that one in due time. Oh yes...
The outdoor thermometer read 93, so I looked around to report this. When I looked back, it had dropped to 92. I don't feel the difference. I wanna go back to my nice, cool fog blanket!
No, that's not true. Here where it's warm, I can sleep all day. The view is greatly green. My joints, though beginning to creak, ache less often they used to do. Of course, Pudee still puts slanderous words on my blog, to which I do most heartily protest, but the air is fresh, and heavy with summer scents. Car exhaust, which I used to think was fresh air, is much fainter now, usually only noticeable around the crack beneath the impenetrable door in the garage.
Too bad the world news is also too hot, and no tsunami is gonna cool that off.
Word.
I want my blanket of fog back
So I can sleep like a log - fuzzily slack
Mornings are gently soft and grey
Why can't the weather just stay that way?
When we were ensconced on the peninsula
I could spend the day in bed hurrah
Now that we're here in this hot land to stay
I wish that bright sun would just go away
That black-and-white cat outside my window
Struts her stuff while I just take things slow
She boasts of her freedom but I think she's lonely
Visiting everyone but wishing I were hers only
Now, she's pretty hot, you bet
Someday maybe she'll be mine yet
We'll prowl around all those cool green bushes
Just need to give this window a feel more firm pushes
But no, I'd miss my human too much
Guess I'll stay in for nuzzlings and such
JJ is a little sun bum
He makes my heart hum
His fur is sleek and warm
A perfect reflection of his form
Full of energy and zest
As a playmate he's the best
Whether laid out on a car hood
Looking fine and feeling good
Or basking in the summer sun
JJ is surely number one
How can anyone doubt this little guy
Is the apple of this eye?
Pudee's home and here to stay
Now I can snuggle the night away
Daylight hours are filled with fresh air
And as much courtyard time as we can bear
So though I've been coughed and been kind of sick
Pudee's been here to wipe it all up real quick
JJ has his game back on
He's full of energy and eager to be gone
The toys in the closet are all dusted off
Now he must prove he hasn't gone soft
Pudee's back and we're really glad
Cuz when Pudee's gone, everyone's sad
(Hey, don't make me sound so much like a sap, writing such drivel, so much pap!)
Night Lights
2 July 2006
Pudee’s returned in dark of night
From distant lands on a long flight
Bringing unfamiliar scents
Filled with emotions oh so tense
Strange at first yet familiar too
Pudee’s warm if slightly blue
JJ’s got his game back on
Thinks the struggle he has won
But just wait till Pudee’s free
Then he’ll see it’s still about me
Pudee’s arms clearly need filling
Not just lashing tails and milling
Mine are the paws that’ll knead Pudee
And help to let those worries be.
3 June 2006
PU's gone away after a lot of hustle and bustle. Now there's no one to play with JJ, so he's using me as he was meant to be: an available Boy Toy. Oh, the humiliation! That's all right, though, for though no one would accuse me of being a "sturdy fellow", (as JJ has been known to be characterized,) I am considered spry and fly. Agility is the key to getting the best of that Little Boy.
Alas, but that too easily must pass. Then the house settles down again to its same stuffy, empty self...
Yesterday P.U. called on the telephone, just for us. I heard the answering machine, but I was busy fending off JJ at the time. Then last night P.U. called again, though not for me. I heard my name, though. Oh, where oh where has my P.U. gone, and when will P.U. return?
Where is that JJ Boy? I need someone to pound...
Today was a tough day for the Little Guy. Everyone was all cuddly and lovey dovey with him this morning, until he was suddenly, seemingly lovingly, swept up and carried off to the kitchen. There he was vilely assaulted by a syringe filled with some sort of clear liquid that left him increasingly unfocused.
Earlier than usual, P.U. returned, this time bearing a new carrying case. JJ being JJ, he checked it out. About an hour later, he found himself zipped into it and being carried out into the courtyard where P.U. turned to lock the door. This was clearly unusual, as we aer both accustomed to being ooshed inside before the door is locked. The next thing I heard was the garage door opening and him mewing piteously.
Two hours later they returned, P.U. reeking of gasoline, JJ reeking of things medicinal. Worse, he hissed me, then attacked. Naturally I easily avoided his charge, but it seemed the better part of valor to retreat to the safety of the bedroom. He followed. There things quickly got stranger.
Not content with hissing me and charging me, JJ ran wildly round and round the room, up across the window ledge, down under the bed and out again, back up and around and around. I got dizzy watching him. Finally, with one last hiss, he zoomed back down the hallway and out into the courtyard.
It's been a tough day since then. From what I can gather, he was shot at least four times, though by the end he was pretty groggy and isn't quite sure. He had a cold glass and metal thermometer shoved up his behind, as well as a cruel plastic loopy thingy, though the vet didn't seem too happy with the results of that incursion. Stuff was shoved up his nose and into his mouth. He was poked, prodded, and pinned down. The whole time his tormentors laughed, as though there were some bad joke or bet being played out at his expense. And now he wants to take out his abuse on me.
Afterwards P.U. rescued him and took him around a large place where there were all kinds of interesting smells. There seemed to be all sorts of interesting toys and things to climb, though he was in no shape to do so. Maybe next time, if he can just evade those nasty molesters... Maybe next time...
Poor JJ
Clearly Foggy
19 May 2006
The rains have returned, ushered in by the blessed return of the fog, though somehow I’m not as elated as I expected to be. Can I be getting acclimated to this so sunny place where it is so frequently warm of late? Today was the first time in a month that JJ and I have been inclined to snuggle down under the comforter.
Too much brightness does not bring the clarity one might expect. Information overload causes glares and sheens to cast a haze over everything. Darkness does not help; what I want is a cloud covering that does not obscure.
Who’s impossible to satisfy?
Road Kill
18 May 2006
How does a duck come to be killed on a seldom traveled road? It has the freedom of flight and aquatics alike, yet evidently it chose to cross the road, and not an egg in sight. People are like that: with all the opportunities and advantages available in a seriously self-indulgent society such as ours, some folks just have to essay the most cumbersome, least efficient path in life with the longest odds. Rumor has it that life is no fun otherwise. How senseless is that? And how much more exciting? or is that exiting?
Sunny Daze
9 May 2006
It’s a warm and sunny day
But the catnip makes me want to play
To which all I have to say
Is YAY!
4JIT
5 May 2006
Saw a license plate passing by
Saw the first four digits and oh my
Was that a metal smith from days of yore
Or a counterfeiter bragging about a score
The car attached to it looked authentic
Though I can’t be sure cuz it went by so quick
Or perhaps it was a reference in Chinese
To that jellyfish dish – I want some please
Maybe I’m just trying too hard
To wiggle and jiggle my brain lard
May Day Is Lei Day
2 May 2006
A day late and a dollar short, I find myself nevertheless enjoying a sunny Hawaiian-style existence, roaming freely in and out of the courtyard despite incursions by the dreaded kitty eater (vacuum) and broom that prevented my blogging yesterday. Freshly hatched nestling birds sound their youthful exuberance. The yellow jackets are back, bringing with them the promise of burgeoning fruit on the leafy lemon tree in whose shade JJ loves to lounge. I myself prefer a good tummy rub with my back up against the concrete slabs whenever I can get it.
Sure, the world is troubled . . . out there . . . What’s an immigrant but someone who has moved away from his/her birthplace to a new locale? I have done that. What’s an undocumented alien but someone who has left no stamped paper trail in triplicate? JJ has official documentation, but I do not; does that make him any more legitimate than I? Sure, he plays harder than I do, but I am the superior lover: ask anyone. And yes, I frequently incite work stoppages, but let’s face it: I’m worth it. The people with whom I share my life are far too stressed; it’s unhealthy. I simply step in and help them to relax, to forget about their worries for a little while. I make their lives better and sweeter, as they do mine. That is called fair trade, or should be.
Ear Blast
30 April 2006
Poor Max!
Got his eardrum blown out
By someone too lax
Who chooses to sit and pout
Instead of learning how to turn the dial
So the earpiece feedback doesn’t echo a mile
And leave those who can still hear
Trembling daily in fear
Of momentarily being deafened
By ignorance too foolish to defend
Star-Spangled Neighborhood
27 April 2006
It was a beautiful day in the neighborhood today. The sun shone brilliantly, glinting off the wind-tipped water. A sizable flag, worthy of a battlefield, waved gently at the entrance to the ungated community. I don’t remember noticing it before, perhaps because it had previously been obscured by fog, rain, and night. Today, however, it set me singing, and soon I found myself in the midst of a rousing chorus of The Star-Spangled Banner. What startled me, however, was the repeated desire to holler out, “Play Ball!” as I rounded the final phrase of the song before plunging back in for another round, as generally happens when a song settles into one’s head.
Play Ball: This is the exhortation of governmental and commercial interests alike. In this land of free enterprise and home of the brave entrepreneur, the general populace is daily encouraged to play ball, to buy into shared acquisitive interests, to blindly stay within bounds and fend off the dangerous tendency to succumb to “rabbit ears” that might cause us to notice what observers think and say. Such spectators are stigmatized as foreigners, aliens, and special interest groups. What can they possibly understand of our shared aspirations? We dare not let them disrupt our unity of spirit as we surge forward toward our destined Pyrrhic victories.
How does one’s mind wend its way from such a patriotic stimulus to such dangerously subversive thoughts? Clearly, it comes from being in a clearly foggy place.
Infinite Hold
25 April 2006
An 800 number call is a curious thing
First there’s that familiar sounding ring
A perky voice pipes up to greet you
Without even asking what why or who
You just get a list of options from which to pick
But you’ll find yourself on hold if you don’t decide quick
That’s when you’ll find yourself on Infinite Hold
Clinging to your receiver till your fingers grow cold
Maybe there’s music but maybe there’s not
Sometimes there’s silence when a company doesn’t care squat
Static’s another curious sound you might hear
If hanging up and redialing is something you fear
I’ve been hanging on here now for nearly two days
My hand’s gone numb and my mind’s in a daze
Every so often someone comes back to promise
Someone will be with me shortly because I’m a call they don’t want to miss
I’d hang up but I’ve forgotten how
To their tactics I refuse to bow
I’ve paid good money and I want it back
It’s just logic that I so clearly lack
Things I Have Learned So Far Today
by Max’s P.U.
24 April 2006
Even a pull-top can cover can have a very sharp edge.
An opposable thumb really makes a difference when trying to do the darnedest things, such as opening a band-aid wrapper, hitting the spacebar on a keyboard, and even trying to slip in a casual game of Freecell or Minesweeper.
Blood can flow pretty darned fast, even uphill.
I’m not as ambidextrous as I thought.
JJ is more perceptive than he gets credit for being.
The sound of someone on one’s roof can resemble the sound of a delivery guy unloading a shipment outside the front door, but the intents are opposite, the former bent on taking, the latter on giving.
Much can happen before a day is half done.
JJ’s UnBirthday
21 April 2006
It should have been his birthday. Thought waves had been emanating in anticipation all month long. Plans had been laid. He’d awaken ready for the day and raring to go, but it was not to be.
Breakfast was the usual; no surprises there. The courtyard door was opened early, and he was not at all reluctant to make use of the opportunity, but alas, it was not to be.
He waited patiently by the garage door, though his quivering tail gave the lie to his seeming placidity as he eagerly awaited the morning treat. After awhile, he realized that people were moving more slowly than he, and he returned to the house, only to hear the garage door opening. Out he zoomed at full tilt – BANG! The garage door swung shut, nearly taking a whisker with it.
Startled, he retreated as rapidly as he had emerged. A moment later the door swung open again. Wary now, he stayed back. Next thing he knew, he was being picked up and kissed, reassured that he is loved. Gradually, his heartbeat slowed.
Eventually, he returned to the courtyard and sat watching the usual morning’s preparations. When it was time for the door to be locked, he trotted promptly inside without hesitation or invitation, to be rewarded by the assurance that he is a “Good Boy!” So why had the door slammed in his face earlier?
It had started out a chilly morning, but by midday the sun, frequently a late riser, had returned to burn off the early fog. In due time the courtyard door was reopened, and he enjoyed his in-and-out privileges. What he really wanted, though, he just couldn’t seem to get: A Game.
Several times he thought it might happen. After all, there had been promises of games all day long as part of his birthday celebration. At one point he was lifted up and allowed to check out the toy closet. His nose twitched as he vacillated between hope and dread, not quite sure what he was supposed to do, afraid that if he was too forward, he would lose it all. Sure enough, he was set back down without any real opportunity to enjoy any of his toys. What was the good of that?
How could his day have been so grossly miscalculated? What did “last month” mean, especially to an eager furry fellow? Max had had his day, without equivocation. He didn’t even get a shrimp dinner.
Poor Little Guy!
Sunshine on My Shoulders
6 April 2006
John Denver had it right:
Sunshine on my shoulders makes me smile
Seems like the rains
Have lasted quite awhile
But today the sun has returned to play
And I have only good things to say
The warmth on my fur
Is just what I’ve needed
Sunshine makes me purr
Clearly my needs have been heeded
I’m a happy cat sitting in the sunshine
Warming my fur, making me feel so fine.
Oh Happy Day
5 April 2006
Today the sun returned and, for the first time in a long time, I eagerly explored the courtyard confines. So much has changed. In addition to all the things P.U. has been doing about the place, the rains have resculpted the basic terrain, carving out new paths to explore, turning over previously unexpected lairs. My whiskers quivered with anticipation as I investigated each new change.
Slugs and snails have been exchanging houses, just as we did last summer. The earthworms were out in force, feasting on the freshly overturned soil. New grass shoots have sprung up across the recently ravaged green. The newly planted apple tree is already settling into its freshly raised mound and putting out infant leaves. Soon the baby spiders will be out and about, a nice change from those pesky ants that have moved indoors during the recent rains. Overhead is the half-familiar sound of baby birdsong, signaling the onset of a new season. Soon the moon will be full again. I can’t wait.
In Memoriam
4 April 2006
Tomorrow is the beginning of Ching Ming
Memorial season for the dead
Evidently it’s a Hawaii Chinese kind of thing
That’s been pounded into my head
When families and clans gather together
To visit our ancestors’ graves
One can always count on stormy weather
As we offer what the dead one craves
Things used to be straightforward and simple
Fireworks, paper money, jai, and a suckling pig
But now there are cars, condos, even a servant with a dimple
And for those who can afford it, the most elaborate rig
How can one keep up with so many dying and dead?
Yet one must go on living and trying to keep a cool head
The rains continue to fall here,
But I guess I should count my blessings,
For I hear that storms far and near
Are causing all kinds of distressings
People huddled in small closet spaces
Find their house ripped asunder
Surly winds leave no traces
Lightning strikes, leaving only thunder
Piles of rubble and debris abound in lieu of hope
As interminable rains wash dreams down a soaked mudslide
How are families in distress supposed to cope?
Trust in God and others to help take it all in stride
Hawaiian say Pele gives and takes back in return
Her gift of land is not something to spurn
But when she returns to claim what is hers
She'll not brook piteous demurs
When Nature has so generously provided
Only to find herself by greedy developers chided
We really have no right to complain
When she decides to reclaim her domain
Of course, that's easier to say than to accept
When it's my turn, there'll be a different tune, you bet
It's hard enough to live on just a prayer
Though maybe that'll make things easier if it's no longer there
We really don't need to go overseas
To make dead people and increase their needs
We've plenty of grief and strife right here
Might as well stay home and rail at what's near.
Good Lovings
30 March 2006
Woke up with a start
I could feel my heart
Headed out the door
Sniffing the floor
Looking for my human
Who was sitting on the can
Just needed to be kneaded
To ease away sweat that had beaded
Some wispy fragment of a dream
I’d let build up too much steam
Till the knot in my stomach
Had left me a bit of a wreck
Good loving’s all it takes
For all our sakes
To usher back in the sunshine
And put an end to a blue day’s pine
Shared strokes and a kiss
Bring back my sense of bliss
What to Write
27 March 2006
What to write?
That’s the plight
So much in the news
People lining up in queues
Marching in protest
Streets filled with unrest
Both at home and abroad
Against governments flawed
People dying in their own neighborhood
Shot by others who feel misunderstood
Where’s Pollyanna when you need her
To give one a reason to purr?
Grrr…
So Many Minds
22 March 2006
So many minds busily clicking
So much noise today with all this ticking
How’s a fellow supposed to sleep
Without clothes piled in a warm heap?
There’s so much tension, I can’t concentrate
Do I interrupt P.U. when there’s JJ to bait?
The doorbell rings; I hate that sound
It always makes me want to go to ground
Dishes are banging, keyboards are clacking
This is worse than when everybody’s packing
At least the glorious sunset signals the end for today
And ushers in feasting and a nighttime of play
Sunset
21 March 2006
I sit and watch the setting sun
See the neighborhood having funWhile JJ sleeps between the sheets
And dreams of crispy protein treats
P.U. smells of something tasty
Typing here all stern and hasty
Nature and Nurture now converge
It’s time for the Maxter to emerge!
Sleep
18 March 2006
Must sleep today to make up for last night
When P.U. tossed and turned
As though in some furious fight
And the skin burned
As though inflamed from within
Fueled by some unseen coal bin
Today though the sun shines brilliant and bright
I seek the cool undercover darkness of night
It’s time to return to my nocturnal roots
So I can survive tonight’s repeated boots
Out of bed as P.U. once again tosses and turns
From the shooting pains and the skin that burns
I Don’t Understand
14 March 2006
I don’t understand why P.U. was so upset
Yesterday was the warmest it’s been yet
We should keep the heater on all the time
I felt so good I wanted to climb
Everything, everyone
Under the sun
Warmth is free
Or should be
Doesn’t cost one single thin dime
And it feels so wonderfully sublime
But there’s P.U., who just can’t let
Well enough alone, I’ll bet
That’s why last night
It was so cold we had to fight
Just to get warm enough to snuggle
Under the covers for a good cuddle
Quiet Day
12 March 2006
Quiet day
Kids play
Sunshine passes
Sleet stirs masses
Cars crash
People dash
Rain falls
Mood palls
Heater stifles
Sound of rifles
Time to sleep
Dream deep
Got Shot Today
8 March 2006
Got shot today
Thought I was headed out to play
Cruising down the hall to send P.U. on the way
Got caught up in a fond farewell embrace
Ended up being removed from my place
Squeezed into a small, dark, smelly space
Fear-bleached scents: more than a trace
Engine started, garage door rose
I could feel my claws curling into my toes
As I heard the garage door once again close
I could taste bile in my throat as it rose
But then fresh scents assailed my nose
There was something familiar about the road
We’d gone this way before, just like Mr. Toad
There’d been a long wait in a distant parking lot
Then we’d returned to our starting spot
JJ had been jealous because he’d been left behind
Reminding him when I got back wouldn’t be unkind
But that kind of trip this one was not meant to be
As all too soon for myself I would see
There was a young woman who weighed me in
Then a young man, not particularly thin
Who tried to stick a cold object up my ass
Till I hissed him; then he let it pass
I was very upset as I’m sure you’ll understand
Respect’s not an option; it’s what I demand
But P.U. was there to hold me until
My breathing slowed down and I lay still
A long time later another young man
This one a doctor with a bit of a tan
He spoke with assurance but moved carefully
Looked into my eyes and understood my plea
I didn’t appreciate the four shots he gave me
But soon enough all I knew was that I was groggy
On the ride home we sped ‘round a curve
Someone made P.U. have to swerve
I found myself rolling along on my side
But I wouldn’t have known if it’d been high tide
Eventually we made it back home in one piece
And I was set down in the kitchen for release
JJ didn’t dare ask questions when he saw my face
Though he did hiss me later when he wanted my space
But mostly he’s left me alone out of the way
Because, well, you know, I got shot today
After the Rain
7 March 2006
Rain rattled on the rooftop and beat on the window panes, then stopped. P.U. opened the glass door onto the courtyard after only a brief argument. The newly cut grass stubble has not yet put forth fresh shoots, but there remain a few untouched tips of old blades, still good for a light snack. I step carefully across the stubble, stopping to greet an earthworm here, a spider there, old friends from before the long annual cold spell.
Behind me I hear JJ checking out the rainwater, P.U. cautioning him against drinking it, as though we do not understand the concerns caused by Marco’s recent demise. Then, seemingly out of nowhere, there arises a once familiar sound: the twittering of newborn birds. JJ is aroused. Too bad he just got his legs run off during his morning exercise session… :->
P.U. leaves the doorway; I follow to supervise the writing of this blog. Too often of late I fear I have been misquoted, misrepresented, misunderstood. One must speak one’s own mind if one desires understanding.
Take the Oscars — no, seriously, take them. Take them off the air. Take away all commercial-interlaced programming that insists on blaring and subsiding, blaring and subsiding, as though eardrums are their personal toys to destroy as they see fit. Of course, that should not be taken as advocacy for exclusive dvd programming either, for even with the closed captioning on, somehow the television set continues to blast and subside, blast and subside. What do those movie makers think they’re doing anyway: imitating real life? How representational can they be when they feature extinct creatures and sentient machinery? Give me a nice, quiet film with lush scenery and low, slow dialogue or better yet, silent films. Now, that was filmmaking!
Who am I kidding? I’ve never seen a silent film – only one on mute. Now that’s what I’m talking about. How else is a fellow to get quality time with the family and still keep up with 22 hours of rest a day? I ask you . . .
Outside My Window
6 March 2006
Outside my window there is a tree
Whose branches have been bare
I sit and watch it day after day
Looking for signs of life out there
Now as the new moon waxes strong
And rains beat upon the glass
I see the beginnings of little buds
And at its base fresh grass
My energy, too, is on the rise
I feel it in my joints and jaws
If only there were birds and mice
To catch between my paws
But, alas, there’s just the one
Who always serves my needs
Where is my little brother now,
JJ, of the many speeds?
M is for March, Melissa, and Max. Let the blustery winds blow where they will - we'll party hardy!
Out a Window
28 February 2006
Sitting in a coffee shop being ignored
Looked out the window cuz I was so bored
When much to my surprise I can’t believe what I see:
Leaves everywhere on each formerly naked tree
Except that little one over there with the faintest buzz
Like a pubescent teen’s first peach fuzz
Spring may not be fully sprung yet
But Nature ‘round here is all set
I’m Not Spoiled
27 February 2006
How dare they say so? I’m not spoiled
When I was a kitten I daily toiled
Day after tomorrow I’ll be six
And still my purr can give them kicks
Loving my human is a labor of love
You know very well what I’m speaking of
Why, just this morning I was sound asleep
When a sorry thought brought me out of the deep
A self-pitying complaint about a lack of greeting
As though every return required a new meeting
We hauled ourselves up, JJ and I
Hustled down the hallway to prevent a moist eye
He purred and I paced, played hard to get
That kind of pleasing hasn’t failed yet
Rain always brings ant trails but do I complain
Not a grumble say I, no I politely refrain
I’m patient, I am, as sure as you please
Even turning my head if I think that I’ll sneeze
So don’t tell me that you think I’m spoiled
Just because I require stroking when I choose to be coiled
Rainy days are here again
I hear those raindrops on my roof
Horses thunder across the turf
Animals subjugated; want further proof?
JJ’s taken my bed again
That chubby ill-trained muscular poof
Windswept sails skim the surf
Amphibians unrelated; I stand aloof
Water is not a cat’s best friend
And so this rhyme now must end
Olympians have wrapped up their show
After Americans had their usual row
Still our representatives show no shame
Content that an uncaring world knows their name
Whatever happened to national pride
And knowing when it was time to hide
Why does the media miss the real heroes
Focusing instead on fools’ woes
Or is it just the news that I read
Missing the good stuff because I forgot to weed
Trash needs dumping, that’s for sure
Only suckers bite at headlines that lure
With tales of wrongdoings instead of what’s right
Tales about those still fighting the good fight
Going about quietly each and every day
Knowing when to go and when to stay
People for whom praises don’t need to ring
People who prefer to cheerfully smile and sing
People whose actions show others how to be
With quiet, hard work, both at home and across the sea
26 February 2006
Life Cycle
25 February 2006
The stillness of another sleepy afternoon was abruptly broken by the sound of a shovel striking stone in the soil on the edge of the courtyard. Voices debated the wisdom of transplanting the long-suffering lemon tree into a hole that might straddle a water pipe. More important to JJ and to me is the fact that the goldfish who preceded us in this family are buried at the base of the lemon tree under discussion. What happens to them if the tree is uprooted? Isn’t that a violation of their final resting place? Or, like Europeans, are their remains sufficiently returned to the earth after five years that they will not be disturbed? Life, death, the endless cycle… these things go round and round in my furry brain… I only wish I knew. I must be satisfied, I suppose, merely to ponder… this and other ineffable things in my world.
Found this in P.U.'s mailbox, evidently downloaded a couple of years ago. Hope you enjoy these as much as I did. gmfe
Vectors 2.0: More Aphorisms and Ten-Second Essays
1. Already tomorrow and too late, still yesterday and too soon.
2. It was not sin that brought death, but the reverse. When God first appeared in Eden, we started, suddenly ashamed we had a secret no immortal could understand.
3. Mountains occur together.
4. I have no time, he snapped, as if he'd just asked himself for alms, and refused.
5. Birds of prey don't sing.
6. Happiness, like water, is always available, but so often it seems we'd prefer a different drink.
7. Travel reminds us we are always traveling.
8. Better to repeat the obvious than fear it.
9. Most of what looks like change is cliché perfecting itself.
10. How often feelings are circular. How embarrassing to appear embarrassed. How annoying to be annoyed.
11. I was 25, till I was 40, 40 till I was 50. But now my age is like the speedometer. If I don't pay attention it drifts, 60, 70, 80....
12. My illness cures me. By telling me at last what's wrong.
13. What a fool! I say of myself, with a vehemence and embarrassment that must mean I'd been thinking I wasn't.
14. The wrong blessing is no blessing.
15. They break down my body, my peace, alas, my principles: devils are personal, like genes. They are the one-room fire on the fourteenth floor that crowds watch, glad it's someone else. For large-scale catastrophe, you need a god: something everyone believes in.
16. In saying my work fails I flatter myself that I have imagined what it should have been.
17. Fire loves best what it cannot burn.
18. Do not be too quick to pull out your flaws. They endure dry seasons, thrive uncared for. They have deeper roots than you. They hold the slope in place.
19. The despair of the blank page: it is so full.
20. Ax built the house but sleeps in the shed.
21. The chorus fills what the soloist has emptied.
22. There is no misstep till you put your foot down.
23. It's not that no one notices his scheme, it's just that it would be more tedious to expose him than to go along. Which is more annoying: that he doesn't know this, or that he probably does?
24. I'm difficult to annoy, but the few who get the knack never seem to lose it.
25. His lie doesn't bother me as much as the truth he thinks he knows.
26. How sure we are that everyone's watching. How sure we are that no one sees.
27. We trust the embarrassed one. He believes the world is thinking of him more than it is. But at least he believes in the world.
28. Useful to see how you could love every person, every job, for an hour. Necessary to realize how short an hour is.
29. It's not a fact or feeling or even a flaw that's embarrassing but who I was pretending to be.
30. What scares me in suffering is the mechanical. The repetition compelled and wobbly, like a wheel with something wrong with it. The voice with something in it like bad brakes.
31. The Unembarrassable are like gods. We envy them; we hate them; they don't exist.
32. Know thyself. Ok, so?
33. Inside the head, art's not democratic. I wait a long time to be a writer good enough even for myself.
34. Institutions are the opposite of God: their periphery is everywhere, their center nowhere.
35. We can "have" ideas or feelings or experiences, but we cannot really tell which are ours, and they can be given away freely. But some things I need permission to tell. Our real privacy belongs to others.
36. Why do I complain, since I'd brush off solace? Some pains I just have to say, as if to confess faults before someone accused me of them.
37. Injustice: the god whose name we whisper when no other has remembered us.
38. First I have to learn to love myself, always makes me writhe. I'm the last person I want to hear I love you from, the last I want to say it to. The part of myself I like is the part that works, like a good tool. The part of myself I love is the part that loves you.
39. He Thought Positively till he became a euphemism for himself.
40. Some busy themselves to distract their passion, others because they cannot find it.
41. Why should they love your work? Do you?
42. When we suffer, we think we owe nothing. We imagine we suffer so we can imagine we owe nothing.
43. When all agree, so does the Devil.
44. Everything's text used to be scary: Look, I believe in less than you. Now it's just another comforting piety. You could be downloaded, Xeroxed, it says, you're immortal. And even better, No one's lived more than you, no one's wiser. Like the old song says, You are everything / And everything is you. A Great Book reading itself in the mirror.
45. Each year gets late earlier.
46. Wisdom was . . . knowing how to hold your head in the wind. But hold it that way always and you're a sermon, an ad, an idiot.
47. Light, beasts of the field, the firmament: easy. But not till the seventh day did God figure out Rest.
48. Billions of years, the dust hasn't settled. Water's still seeking its own level.
49. A car or stone becomes the exact temperature of the winter, but a man gets colder and colder.
James RichardsonThe Yale ReviewVolume 92, Number 2April 2004 Copyright © 2004 by Yale University All rights reserved. Reproduced by Poetry Daily with permission.
Warm-Up
22 February 2006
The weather’s warming
I like this trend
Though bugs are swarming
There’s more outdoor time to spend
That’s it; that’s all I’ve got to say
Why should I ramble on
When there’s sunshine in which to play?
I’m gone.
Smoked Out
20 February 2006
Smokey days choking haze
P.U. has put me in a daze
Two days of burning
Mounds of wood
Orthanc here at home
Can’t possibly be good
Aunty Gracie charred chicken flesh
Aunty Lynette caught JJ in mesh
Round floaty things everywhere
Chewable ribbon instead of cat hair
So many strangers in this place
All putting their noses in my face
What’s a fellow to do but retreat
Till late at night for a midnight treat?
JJ loves the pork juice on the ground
I like the salmon and shrimp all around
But smoke does funny things to perfectly good food
Putting me into an awkward mood
Today’s so cold after all that burning
And now my tummy has started churning
Auwe
Cold Blew
16 February 2006
This day was cold and quiet
But sundown has brought noise
JJ and I made a bet
About P.U.’s strange new toys
He bet that sitting in the sun
Would warm his frozen haunches
I figured when P. U. was done
There’d be shrimp for our hungry paunches
The sun waxed warm
Though the day was cold
There were no clouds to form
Pictures daring and bold
No foggy banks did I espy
To offer a warm blanket
Just crisp winds dry
Under clear blue sky with no rain in sight yet
When finally the sun started down
And still the car had not returned
JJ began to worry and frown
Though I was not concerned
Soon enough as I had foretold
The garage door was heard to open
In came P.U. bringing a bit of cold
And the scent of distant fen
The ocean, too, was in the air
And something else, I think
There was a hint of something fair
Mixed in with something stink
P.U. pulled out a hammer
Then came out a drill
The din was worse than the usual yammer
And then there was a spill
More blood than usually flows at night
Flowed from that damaged limb
The carpet changed red from white
The drill had just caught the rim
Now the house is quiet again
The flow of blood is staunched
Neither bettor can claim this night a win
Tomorrow a new campaign will be launched
For now it is enough to know
The house is warming up
And P.U.’s noise reaped what it did sow
Till the brim overflowed the cup
Love Is All a Round
15 February 2006
You say love and I chime in
First you speak, then I begin
The words sound good as they come out
But I don’t understand what the fuss is all about
We say these words each and every day
We show each other love in every conceivable way
Why should one day be more special than the next?
Why labor to compose that particular text?
If I’m a day late and a dollar short,
Will our love be something you have to abort?
Yesterday, today, and tomorrow will still all be
The perfect time to share love between you and me
So say it again just like before
Each day promise to love me more
So what if it’s just more of the same verse?
It’s still sweet, even when terse
Your actions are what show me how much you care
They are the proof of the love that you bear
Don’t bother to spend a lot of money
Just show me that I’m still your special honey
Yesterday’s so over, don’t give it another thought
I don’t care what you have or haven’t bought
Get over here and let’s get down to cuddling
That’s what fixes everything when I feel I’m just muddling
You’re the one that I want, I have no doubt
When you’re not with me, I always pout
But hold me and love me and stroke me all night
When we’re in each other’s arms, everything is all right
JJ the Magnificent
February 13, 2006
He leaps, he bounds
He makes no sounds
This ruddy Abyssinian
He spins, he twirls
He wows the girls
No matter what room he’s in
He paces, he stalks
Oblivious of gawks
He’ll not be done in
But despite pounces and quick starts
He just scrapes the feathers’ parts
Till the game is called
Now he can catch his breath again
Oh boy oh boy oh boy! What a day! What a day!
P.U. has spent the last two days in the garage, and we got to go along! Yesterday all those musty dusty boxes got moved to the other side of the garage, opening up a great big space. That was scary, but the good news was that the boxes were neatly stacked into cool steps and covered with tarp. JJ scaled to the top and settled down to survey the changed landscape while I investigated under the covers. It was great.
Then today P.U. decided to do some more stuff. I was just resting on the bed after a busy night romping around the halls when I was rudely awakened by some loud banging. At first I thought a plane had finally crashed into the garage, but when I went to check things out, it was just P.U. putting a couple of the Gorilla shelves back together. When the noise stopped, the real fun began.
At first I didn't know what was going on, but then I realized what P.U. was doing, so I called JJ to come see. We had just settled comfortably on the boxes when P.U. started moving them again. Soon we would be trapped on an island with no way down. Naturally I moved, but JJ just sat there and kept watching. Finally he had to leap down from atop a stack of boxes nearly five feet high. I saw him hesitate, but he finally did it. You gotta admire him for his grit, if not for his foresight.
Eventually all the boxes were either stacked neatly on the shelves, against the wall, or emptied. By that time I could feel the temperature dropping, signalling the end of another day. I headed back into the house as P.U. finished cleaning up.
Zzzzz Time!
AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES
1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto. The blockage will be almost instantly removed.
2. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.
3. Avoid arguments with the little woman about lifting the toilet seat by simply using the sink.
4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.
5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.
6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.
7. Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you will forget about the toothache.
Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of life really are:
You only need two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape.
If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40.
If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.
Also, remember:
Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
Never pass up an opportunity to go to the bathroom.
If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You get another chance.
If you shop anywhere but Wal Mart, you are just showing off!
And finally, be really nice to your family and friends; you never know when you might need them to empty your bedpan.
Pride
6 February 2006 – Embarcadero, SF
Water cascades in many streams
From diverse sources, so it seems
Reminiscent of youthful dreams
But all from manmade constructs
Leaking at the seams
Tieless men in shirts of blue
With coats and pants of like dark hue
Primp and play before the spray
While a photographer waits;
He has all day
These overgrown boys who would be men
Can change the world with the stroke of a pen
Token females more girls than women
Stand smiling patiently nearby
Suppressing within any sign of a sigh
Seagulls overhead ignore the foolish folk below
When time’s victorious, then they’ll crow
JJ has just marked the first bird sound of the new season. His bark is distinctive, a clear challenge to the feathered fowls that will soon be flocking back to mock my little brother and me for our earthbound status. 'Ware! War is coming! Fell deeds will be wrought upon any fowl fiend that dares to land or even buzz our courtyard.
Yes, been watching LotR again; how could you tell?
P.U. says those must be cherry blossoms burgeoning outside the windows and down the streets, flushing pinkly as they make their way up the barren tree trunks and stems. Would that I might see more!
What is with this archaic speech? P.U.: cut that out.
Spring is coming but it's not here yet
Buds are breaking through
Soon it'll be time to put up a net
One more gardening task to do
Meanwhile the rain just keeps coming down
Soaking the ground and driving us crazy
Causing my human to continually frown
While we all sit indoors warm and lazy
Brief bit of sun today led to some planting
Steady rain tonight will wash down new leaves
Cause fragile seedlings to do precarious slanting
Damage not covered by maintenance fees
Television's the same with its continual din
Children watch mesmerized every night
Parents and educators rage they can't win
Against mass media in such an unfair fight
A New Avenue of Exploitation
New York-bound puppies used as drug smugglers, feds say -- Newsday.com
February 1, 2006
People, especially movie makers, have been complaining about humans being used as couriers for smuggling drugs from one country to another. Now that that corridor is being more closely watched, black market purveyors have found another method: the intestines of animals. Thus far only Labrador retriever puppies have been discovered in this enterprise, but who is to say that there are not other animals being forced into this vile trade as well? If an unscrupulous veterinarian is willing to cut up a purebred puppy, why not a fine feline as well? Fortunately, unlike JJ, I am of feral ancestry, protected by my lowly birth. One cannot help but note the irony that people of the lowest echelons and animals of the highest breeding should be so similarly exploited. What does that say about the values of those involved in this enterprise?
(Another human interjection)
Mocha
January 28, 2006
I met Mocha this morning. She’s a sweet, rolypoly bulldog who was waddling through the greensward past my place. Her mission was clear: she was taking her long, tall, lean, silver-haired human of amiable disposition for a daily constitutional. He called her pampered; I assured him that that was only right, fitting, and proper. We smiled and parted company.
Upon my return to the house, I was promptly accosted and thoroughly sniffed by not one but two inquiring muzzles. Curiosity had been aroused. Fortunately, there was no overt disapproval, as sometimes happens when I encounter other four-legged creatures upon my walks. Mocha, then, is at least contingently on the approved list. It is good to have family approval of new acquaintances.
Skeletal Regrowth
January 26, 2006
Winter is a time of dearth
A time to humker down around a hearth
But January brings fresh hope
As buds on trees begin to grope
Their way up out of close-shut sprigs
And birds drift back to begin Spring jigs
The barren bones that have lined the streets
Are filling in spaces, exciting heartbeats
There’s a promise on the still-barren air
That emptiness won’t always be there
Barbecue grills are on display in stores again
And ink is flowing more easily in the pen
Traffic is snarled from new construction
Meant to repair the ravages of winter destruction
True, they’re just buds on barren limbs now
But soon, very soon the world will be . . .WOW!
Subject: Fw: MONEY
Verily I say unto ye.......... Money
It can buy a house
But not a home
It can buy a clock
But not time
It can buy you a position
But not respect
It can buy you a bed
But not sleep
It can buy you a book
But not knowledge
It can buy you medicine
But not health
It can buy you blood
But not life
So you see money isn't everything
And it often causes pain and suffering
I tell you this because I am your friend
And as your friend I want to
Take away your pain and suffering!!
So
Send me all your money
And I will suffer for you!
Cash only please!
After all, what are friends for, huh??
I HOPE THIS MADE YOU SMILE!!!
LAUGHTER IS THE BEST MEDICINE!
JJ won't play - he's waited and waited, and now it's too late;
He still dreams as he waits by the gate,
But his ship has sailed, he's moved on with his life;
Now he dreams of life without strife
Max has arrived, he's ready and waiting
This boy wants loving and for him there's no sating
Today is yesterday's tomorrow
Let there be no sorrow
Death comes to us all — no telling how
Might as well live each day in the now
JJ just got sick
But covered it quick
With a stack of magazines
Featuring fantasy teens
So Max has to go down
While PU cleans up after the clown
Down by the Sea
January 22, 2006
The sea, the sea, how I long to see the sea
Where waves roll and foam tumbles
Along the shore people stroll and dogs gambol,
Boats bob at anchor and surf rumbles
Sellers throng to hawk their wares
The novice bargain seeker timidly mumbles
But when sunny skies give way to dark clouds
The power of Nature the most arrogant humbles
Then lively crab claws wave in despair
To the beloved depths just over there
Just beyond reach lies their once happy home
Just out of reach beneath roiling foam
As wary humans batten down hatches
Before stormy skies fill in those ominous patches
Morning Mist
January 20, 2006
This morning a mist lay on the golf course
Hugging the ground knee-high
Golfers and duffers alike feared the terrible force
Of the winter storm just off-shore nearby
And so the links lay open wide
Without a soul in sight
While boisterous souls lined up inside
Using liquid to fend off fright
Now that the sun has burned off the mist
The tale they tell has a different twist
There’s many a story of a magnificent save
From desert’s edge to the mouth of a cave
But truth to tell there’s scarcely a soul
Willing to brave foul weather in pursuit of a goal
What’s Left to Say?
A Sonnet to Bygone Summer
January 20, 2006
My human has taken my voice away,
And left me here with my brother;
I have many a fake mouse with which to play
But since they’re not real, why bother?
The sun that first warmed
Our new house on the Bay,
Where high hopes last summer were formed,
Has cooled considerably, I must say.
The ground is soaked with floating stuff:
There are bugs and beetles and debris galore,
Some of it’s soil, some weeds once so tough,
All I know is cleanup will be quite a chore.
But the promise of newness that now seems so dead
Can’t really be gone; It’s still in my head.
A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak. After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done.
The monsignor replied, " When I am worried about getting nervous on
the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip."
So next Sunday he took the monsignor's advice. At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a drink. He proceeded to talk up a storm.
Upon his return to his office after the mass, he found the following note on the door:
1) Sip the vodka, don't gulp.
2) There are 10 commandments, not 12.
3) There are 12 disciples, not 10.
4) Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.
5) Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass.
6) We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C.
7) The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy,
Junior and the spook.
8) David slew Goliath, he did not kick the shit out of him.
9) When David was hit by a rock and was knocked off his donkey, don't say he was stoned off his ass.
10)We do not refer to the cross as the "Big T."
11)When Jesus broke the bread at the last supper he said, "take this and eat it for it is my body." He did not say " Eat me" .
12)The Virgin Mary is not called " Mary with the Cherry,.
13)The recommended grace before a meal is not: Rub-A-Dub-Dub thanks
for the grub, Yeah God.
14)Next Sunday there will be a taffy pulling contest at St.Peter's
not a peter pulling contest at St. Taffy's.
Sun and Rain
January 18, 2006
This day that promised to be so bright
Ended up anything but —
Each time I chanced a trip outside,
I got wet; that isn’t right.
Pink hibiscus lies crumpled and wet
Glistening in the bright sunlight
But whenever I venture out to check
The rains fall again and I start back in fright.
No, fright’s not the right word
For that connotes danger
And everyone knows
I’m more fearless than a ranger.
No, that’s not exactly true either . . .
I’m easily startled (because I’m so alert)
My senses are attuned to the slightest changes
In order to avert unnecessary hurt.
Back to the subject at hand for today
The sun teased me mercilessly amidst dark clouds
Inviting me out to play
Only to retreat behind ominous shrouds.
Hawaii people call it liquid sunshine
All I know is I want what’s mine
Give me back my courtyard and grass
Bring back my sunshine and let this rain pass.
Interior Flooding
(January 7, 2006 — 5:23 p.m., PST)
The floods rose again today
Soap floated by every which way
JJ thought it would be fun to play
But our other human chased him away
The sink offered another way to drink
But that was off-limits, too, I think
Which is fine, since soon a stink
Filled the kitchen and made me blink
Where can a fellow go for quiet
When all the world is filled with riot
If you’re selling, I’ll buy it
Or settle for a fish, if you’ll fry it
Where is my human, so tall and warm
So able to keep a fellow from harm
My human’s absence has left me forlorn
Filled me with a loneliness not to be borne
Maybe I will drink from that putrid sink
Make myself sick and puke up pink
Or maybe I’ll just be my nekko self
And pout quietly here up on this high shelf
Morning came early today, but breakfast didn't; what's up with that?
More suitcases are being piled by the main (back) door. That would be okay, since it signals a possible end of the invasion, but my human's bags have joined the growing pile, and I am not happy.
JJ has gotten special lovings, both last night and this morning; what's up with that?
I don't want to say goodbye, but I don't want to miss my opp either... Must prowl. Constant vigilance!
The suitcases are out
But I'm not gonna pout
I'll just lie here
On the dryer
So the bedroom door can't be closed
Without the question having been posed
As to where Max is
Oops! That idea's a fizz
The door just shut
To whom does my human belong? To me or to that stranger who has invaded our abode? Since when do I rate merely perfunctory loving before being encouraged to dismount and distance myself? I thought we had settled the issue of work priorities long ago: I come first. When will this nonsense about "other duty" end? I'll give my human one more day... if things don't change, I'll just have to put my paw down. More firmly. 'Nuff said.
Max, JJ, and family wish for you and yours a cheery holiday season. In this new year, may you obtain all that you require, receive all that you desire, and enjoy moments of serendipity through every season.
